THE HOSPITAL BAG

There are plenty of sites out there telling you what to take to hospital with you when you have a baby. For example this one, or this one. There’s even an NHS video:



So I'll save us both another exhaustive list and just focus on a few things I liked having in hospital.

As they mention in that video, its important to pack your bag a good 3 or 4 weeks before your due date, just in case, and write a list of extra things that you'll need to put in last minute.

Coconut Water

This helps to keep you hydrated during labour. I took a couple of cartons of coconut water with me to sip in between glasses of water. 

Thirst quenching coconut water

iPod Speakers

It was great to be able to listen to music during the birth - make a few playlists beforehand. Your labour room will be a little sanctuary in no time.

Conran Audio Speaker Dock

Organic Shampoo

I had a shower in my room and it was great to take a shower and wash my hair during labour. I found that this Jason shampoo was also great for the days following the birth as it is clean and sensitive. 

Pure and natural toiletries

Lip Balm

It's easy to get dehydrated during labour, so take a lip balm. This Lanolips balm is my newest beauty discovery. Made of 100% of Ultra Pure Medical Grade lanolin, its so natural that it can even be used on the mouths of new born babies!

A wonder product

Natural Deodorant

The aluminium in most deodorants is said to be bad for the baby when you're breastfeeding (this is disputed, but I didn't want to risk it). I use this amazing Lush T'eo natural deodorant powder. I've heard that the Burts Bees deodorant is also a good alternative.

Natural antibacterial deodorant

A Soft Towel

It was really nice to have a gigantic, fluffy towel with me when in hospital. You should take really soft one, because you'll be sore after the birth. I love the Cath Kidson bath sheets.

Hampton Rose bath sheet

A Button-Down Nightie

Take something cotton and comfortable with buttons down the front for breastfeeding. This John Lewis checked nightshirt would be perfect with a cosy bath robe on top.

A baggy nightshirt

Baby's First Outfit

You'll need to have a little outfit ready for the baby after they come out. I had a beautiful sleepsuit all covered with leaves. Pick something that's quite cosy, as they are often a bit cold after they're born. The Petit Bateau sleepsuits are lovely.

A Petit Bateau sleepsuit

A Blanket

The mother of Lyra's godmother bought her a beautiful satin edged cellular blanket from The White Company. If I'd have had it for when she was born, I'd have certainly taken it with me to wrap her up in.

Beautiful soft blankets

Muslins

As well as a blanket, it's a good idea to take some muslins with you. The absolute best ones in my eyes are the Aden + Anais ones. I use the giraffe print muslin blanket all the time. 

Fresh muslins

Nursing bras

I found that John Lewis has some really nice ones, like this Elle Macpherson Intimates bra. You'll need one of these following birth, as well as some breast pads. The milk which is first produced after the birth is the best thing you can give to your baby, better than anything money could buy!

HAVING A BABY IN A FOREIGN COUNTRY

New territories

When I was 6 months pregnant I not only moved houses, I moved to a different country. It was all quite unexpected. Leaving my Shoreditch flat, I packed my bags (and many, many boxes) and flew north, to Norway…to the snow, and pine forests and the startlingly fresh air.

Not only was I waving goodbye to London and England, I was waving goodbye to the British medical system (to which I was so familiar, being a doctor’s daughter and a midwife’s daughter), and, for the time being, waving goodbye to my (beloved) English language.

It seemed as though I was facing what might be the most daunting experience of my life.

Obviously, this whole situation throws up a million ‘how does one cope with…?’ questions. But today, I’ll just be writing about my experience of, and the advice that came from, giving birth in a foreign country.

* * * 

‘Kontroll’ is the Norwegian word for ‘check-up’. It was one of the first words I learnt on my journey through the Norwegian health system. ‘Kontroll’, I thought, was a slightly unsettling word for someone in my situation.

Lost control, and lost-in-translation. That’s how it all seemed at the beginning, and those feelings were probably the most difficult thing about giving birth in a foreign place. It was good to have a Norwegian-English speaker (my bf) at the appointments with me, although the nurse spoke almost perfect English. 

I had been having check-ups in England and had already developed expectations from those. I didn't know if I'd have the same tests or check-ups, and I was worried that I would get to hospital and have something unfamiliar and unexpected thrust upon me. So I tried to ask as many questions as possible, even about the simplest things, just to get an idea of how things were done over here. Whilst there were differences, it actually turned out that there were many things I preferred in the Norwegian system. They were very keen on trying to encourage natural birth, and were on my side when it came to my wish not to be induced at day 11.

Whilst I needed to manage my homeland expectations, that’s not to say that they weren’t useful in some way. In the Norwegian health centre, they loaded me up with leaflets, all of them in Norwegian, and none of which I understood at the time. Luckily I also had a folder of all the stuff I was given in England. Getting hold of English resources (NHS guides, books, magazines) helps you to learn about what to expect. You could ask a friend back home to send you these things, or contact your old doctor directly.

As it got closer to due date, I was invited on a tour of the maternity wing at the hospital. This helped to familiarise me with everything there. The tour was in Norwegian, but I had my boyfriend/translator with me. Even though it was useful, I still had a few niggling doubts at the back of my mind. 

Forest for miles and miles (hospital view)

Afterwards, I went to the midwife office, and asked if I could meet up with the water-birth midwife (they have to be specifically trained so there were only 2 in the hospital) and I did so a few days later. I had written out a simple birth plan in English and Norwegian and I wanted to discuss if it was all ok with her. She was an older lady, experienced, and mostly spoke Norwegian. I seemed to understand what she was saying and I think it’s because we just clicked on an intuitive level. She offered that I pop back the next day and she do acupuncture – it was almost like being in a spa, and I’m pretty sure that you can’t get acupuncture so readily on the English NHS. So I was very open to trying new things! Fate would have it that she happened to be on duty when I turned up to have Lyra, and delivered her.  

When it came to the birth itself, I didn't even notice that the language being spoken around me was foreign. My birth plan had to go out of the window at one point, and when this happened I called my dad (who's a doctor and has worked as an obstetrician) in England and asked him if I should let them do it, and he just said to me 'you have to trust whatever they're telling you', and from then on I did. 

So, my advice for giving birth in a foreign country:

1. Take a translator to your appointments (partner, friend, in-law)
2. Ask questions to familiarise yourself with the new system
3. Get hold of homeland resources (NHS guides, books, magazines)
4. Go to visit the maternity wing if you plan to give birth in a hospital
5. Organise to meet up and speak with a midwife a while before giving birth, and ask her all of the questions you have
6. Write out your birth plan as simply as possible, in both languages, and discuss with a midwife
7. Be open to new things, and make it a task to discover something new and better
8. Trust the midwives who are with you during the birth

THE BEST THINGS ABOUT BIRTH

Whilst there is so much information out there about childbirth, you barely ever see anything about the good side of it. So I thought I'd do a little post about the best bits, and in no particular order, here they are...

~ The last trimester of pregnancy is finally over! You feel immediate physical relief after the birth. You can breathe comfortably again, lie on your back without feeling like you’re being suffocated, lie on your side without feeling like your muscles are stretched to breaking point and your bruised ribs are finally free from being kicked every five minutes. You’re free! At this point you know you’re at the beginning of having your body back, as yours. I had the best nights sleep ever the night after having Lyra.

~ Whilst commonplace, birth is still one of the most awe-inspiring things on earth, and you get to experience it first-hand. There are 4 babies born every second, so just imagine yourself as part of that worldwide female strength.

~ It doesn’t have to be painful. You can do it how you want to do it these days. If you want medical relief (which can be amazing) you can have it! If you think you’ll want something like an epidural, plan it with your midwife beforehand. And if you’re scared of the epidural itself, don’t be because it’s really not that bad. There are also ways to have a comfortable natural labour without medicine, like HypnoBirthing.

~ You will be proud of yourself, and others will be proud of you too.  

~ You finally meet your baby!